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Match report vs Sully Spartans 19 April 2009 @ Sully Centurians (Burnham Ave) (Skipper and Report Muff (with his new gay car)

For the first time since my joining the casuals the curtain raiser wasn’t against the Wanderers but a new outfit which appeared to be made up of Chartered Trusts indoor team, a captain and some old guy (more on this dude later).

On a lovely sunny day Muff acting skipper for the day won the toss and put the oppo in for no more reason than to prolong the game. Unfortunately the oppo prolonged the game by their openers, including the captain, who took an eternity to get on the pitch. For reasons best known to himself the Spartans skipper wanted to play 36 overs so with 6 overs max Winkie did the honors and got the season underway.
A good opener against the tall opener (Andy f will provide the details as he has the score book, some of it on his new shirt sleeves) and Pabs takes the second.

After a few good swingers Pabs gets the captain to nick one straight to Muff at slip, happy to snaffle the first chance of the year.
This of course only brought the big south african (BSA) to the crease.
Winkie and Pabs bowled the first 10 overs instead of 8 because I can’t count without further reward although Pabs had a stumping turned down which really should have been given. It was obvious that BSA and the tall opener liked the pace so a cunning plan was hatched and DT and The Fox were called to the fray. This cunning ploy worked up to a point.

The point at which BSA decided he fancied Fox for lunch and gave poor John a hell of a beating. With no handy means of putting the old boy down he retired gracefully to the covers where he was spotted diving (and stopping) the ball!
Andy f declared himself fit for duty and took over from The Fox and calmed things down a little before BSA was given run-out by the oppo skipper when he could easily have said no after a fumble (deliberate!) and then good work from Winkie to Smitts behind the stumps. Andy then had the dreadlocked guy plum lbw not given but getting his man a couple of balls later bowled.

DT meanwhile bowled with great control, flite and variation for 6 straight overs without reward but for only 21 which in the circumstances is an excellent effort.
Muff re-placed DT and swung a few, some in the air others off the bat, but picked up a wicket stumped by the smart work of Smitts.
Andy f bowled his 6 overs straight through picking up the big wicket of BSA's brother, who if anything hits it harder than BSA.

With the oppo looking to up the rate in the last few overs Winkie and Pabs came back for their last over each (sorry guys but I swear I only counted 8!) but with no joy.
This left Muff and The Fox to finish it off and The Fox came back well to take 2 wickets, one bowled and another caught by the aching lethargic Kim at cover suffering from an Aussie rules competition........

Winkie 6-1-32-0 (bowled better than this suggests)
Andy f. 6-0-22-2 (at the batsmen every ball)
Pabs 6-2-15-1 (bowled as well as this suggests)
DT 6-0-21-0 (great figures in the context of the game)
Fox 6-0-54-2 (good comeback after getting mauled)
Muff 6-1-26-1 (flattered. lucky to bowl to windowlickers not BSA)

195 for 7 at tea, except tea was to be after the game at some bar and grill so the casuals chewed on some old shoe leather and sent Kim and Darren (little) Britton to open (I’m sorry Darren but I didn’t choose it. I wanted Great.)

A steady start was asked for and that’s what we got both Little and Kim (lil' Kim?) looking solid and in no real trouble until Darren edged to the keeper for 6 which was a shame as he was looking set as was Kim who now joined by Tesh was hitting with great authority and got to his fifty shortly after drinks. Needing fiftyish of the last 10 Kim and Tickle played straight and hit the bad ball and picked up the singles serenely until the old dude appeared.

Looking back now it was an episode of the twiglight zone a short journey into another dimension.
The oppo skipper informs me he’s going to give old dude a bowl and he’s going to bowl under-arm.
Yes really, under-arm.
It seemed a little churlish to say no so thinking this would be over soon and we could get back to the game I agreed.
I went to raise my arm to stop him as Tesh wasn’t ready and he was 3 feet in front of me! Hadn’t even heard him come up next to me!

Anyway, the ball is lobbed about 6 feet down the wicket and rolls slowly to the crease and poor Tickle doesn’t know what to do and wears a look much like someone must give a grenade rolled into a bunker.
He gets one to bounce a couple of times but it mainly just rolls. Fighting the temptation to no-ball him every ball I decide to let him finish which mercifully he does. The skipper then informs me he’s going to give him another over! Aghhhhhh. I tell him that if he bowls i'm going to no-ball him. Skipper says he wants to give the guy a game whilst he’s still above ground and I'm a sucker for a hard luck story so I agree on the understanding that if he takes a wicket I’ll no-ball it.
The old dude then proceeds to tell me all about the no-ball rule and when I wide him for one a yard down leg he tells me it can’t be a wide as it went under the bat!!!!! The over finally ends with much grumbling even from his own side and we get on with the game.

Tesh battled his way through as by his own admission didn’t time a ball all day so his 42, brought to an end with 5 overs to go caught behind, was a superb effort.
This brought JR to the crease and with Kim still there and 3 overs to get 11 it looked tight but winnable. Kim smacks another ball to the boundary and his hundred comes up in style. Terrific knock and only one chance given.
2 to win off the last over.
Kim on strike picks up a half volley and fires it straight down deep mid-ons throat. Out for a classy 102.
2 needed off 5.
Smitts in but James is next to go - bowled for 4.
2 needed off 4.
Smitts edges to the gully.
2 needed off 3.
Winkie tips and runs Pabs would have been out but the keeper doesn’t have the ball when the stumps are broken.
1 needed off 2.
Another tip and run and the game is sealed.
Only us.

Top game to play in I think we all had a good day and I’m going to pretend the 2 overs in the middle didn’t really happen.
Now, a serious point.
We had tea at a bar in the caravan park by the Captain’s wife and as I was leaving I noticed that there was still some food left.
I know that a couple of us had roasts to go to but come on! What kind of message does that send out?


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