Match report vs South
Glam 3 July 08@ Llanrumney (Skipper John Furnham, report
Several years ago I used to know a journalist who reported
on Glamorgan and Cardiff City and told me about the “death
knock” as they call it. So when Mr and Mrs S of South
Wales have their daughter murdered after taking part in gang
bang the journo goes up to the door and knocks and asks if
they want to talk about it. Some actually do so they can tell
the world how nice she was but lots tell you to f*ck off;
either way it’s not a fun experience. Sometimes writing
about a cricket match can be painful, this is my death knock.
Sometimes events happen and you think f*ck me that was a
bit of luck like the time when I was in a cheap hotel and
popped my head out the window looked to my left and lo and
behold there was a fit bird lying on the bed in her knickers
and bra watching TV oblivious to the fat voyeur. You know
what it’s like some days it all goes right and then
all can go tits up.
After about 10 overs of this match I was thinking everything
is going right here, just everything. They were not very many
for plenty of wickets. We don’t have their innings in
our book so I will go by memory. Paul and Dan opened up against
the formidable pair of Sparkes and Nick Allan. Despite Allan
hitting two boundaries’ off Paul (here we go we thought)
against decent balls both were gone in the first couple of
overs. Dan who bowled two awesome overs had Sparkes caught
at gully by Andy H and then some great fielding by Shandy
led to Allan being run out.
In fact everything just went for us. Andy caught another
one after a bit of a juggle off Dan, Dewbs some great fielding
for another run out. Dan the same later on, the fielding was
great and the bowling really good, not many boundaries were
scored (I did get twatted for 6 over my head) and only one
catch dropped which was only really a half chance and not
many of us would have pushed it up like Andy H did. The only
blip was the odd no ball from Nadeem but who than came back
to take a wicket. Dewbs didn’t even get a bowl as we
had them all out. The people who don’t bowl often (i.e.
me, Pikey (don’t listen to Shakes you can bowl) and
Steve did ok. In fact I know its time to give up when Steve
bowls better than you! JF behind the stumps had Tesh (who
has taken a bit of stick lately with the ball) today instead
of Dave to help him to two stumpings as Tesh bowled brilliantly
too. JF has taken out more stumps this week than Paul McCartney.
Sorry if I missed out any brilliance boys but am doing it
from memory and there was quite a bit of brilliance to remember!
P Stephens 2 overs 0 maidens 13 runs 0 wickets
D Lewis 2 1 1 2
Hand 2 0 7 1
Hood 2 0 5 1
Afzak 1 0 8 1
Furnham 2 0 12 0
Pike 2 0 11 0
O’Reilly 2 0 7 0
Hirani 1.4 0 9 2
3 run outs - shandy, Dewbs, Dan
Anyway they scored 72 all out. I said to Dan as we walked
off if we don’t beat them now we never will!!!!!!!
JF and PS opened up and for the second time in a week (very
rare indeed) the skipper failed as he was caught at short
cover to a fine low down catch for 0. 0 for 1 after 5 balls.
Steve O at number 3 slapped a couple and was also out to a
good catch at mid on I think for 6 off 7 balls. 14 for 2 in
the 4th over. This brought in Shandy.
JF was feeling helpless and didn’t know what to do
with himself, Steve was saying what a stupid game it was along
with many a f*ck. Earlier Steve did some calling for them
during a run out (though it didn'teffect the result). He then
told me that he can’t help himself and has to almost
pass comment after every ball. He says he is getting worse
and now he is beginning to irritate himself! Can’t remember
you ever being quiet Steve, although you obviously do understand
a lot better what is going on these days which is maybe why
you have more of an opinion. He also suggested that if he
had the heavy bat his shot would not have been caught. He
was happy for Shandy to have it but while Shandy was out there
he commented that Shandy should have used a lighter bat as
he is just a boy and not strong enough to handle it (!). He
then went on to say something like due to his member that
he is used to having to use two hands to hold something heavy
or words to that effect. Explains your technique then Steve.
Out in the middle the score had reached 36 in the 12th over
when Paul trying to get on with it was also caught by a good
catch for 17 off 33 balls. This as it turned out was our highest
score by 11. Shandy then holed out in the deep mid wicket
boundary for 5 off 30 balls. 37 for 4 in the 13th became 37
for 5 two balls later when Dewbs was stumped for 0 from two
Nadeem tried to twat everything and was also caught by a
good catch (they did catch well to be fair) for 3 off 7 balls
and now we were 42 for 6 at the end of the 15th. We needed
31 from 3 overs.
Pikey and Tesh did their best to get on with it and did hit
a couple of decent blows before Pikey was bowled trying to
twat it for 6 off 9 balls in the 17th over. Andy Hood now
in thankless task mode slapped one straight up in the air
first ball. Andy was not as pissed off as he was at Tintern
but he was not a happy hoodie.
Tesh had crossed hit a two then got bowled for 4 trying to
do what had to be done. Dan at the other end was earlier looking
forward to his 100 dnb but it was not to be. This meant that
with 7 balls to go we needed 20 and I was facing. This was
the only ball I faced as it hit my foot, I had no idea where
it had gone, Dan rightly called me through, the bowler had
picked it up and (I just knew he would) with a direct hit
captain Allen took out my stumps and in his 2nd over had taken
3 wickets and a direct hit and we were all down and out for
50 f*cking 3 off 17 overs.
The Casuals camp site at the boundary edge was not a happy
place. Losing has become a regular thing for me this year,
lost every game on Saturday and apart from Tintern on Sunday
too. I know we don’t play to just win and would rather
lose a close game than win easily (as long as that don’t
happen all the time) but it was gutting losing a game that
we really should have won and then given us a massive chance
of winning the cup. To get Allan and Sparkes so early and
them to be without Jack Lansdowne (good bat and bowl) and
the lefty Harding who has scored so many against us was tough
I know we had no Quim, Manish, Muff, Shakes, Smitty etc etc
but I think we all felt we should have scored more than 53.
JF 0 off 5 balls
PS 17 off 33 balls -2 fours
S,OR 6 off 7 balls-1 four
SH 5 off 30 balls
DD 0 off 2 balls
NA 3 off 7 balls
JP 6 off 8 balls
Tesh 4 balls?
AH 0 off 1 balls
DL 0 not out 0 balls
AF 0 run out 1 ball
Only Paul reached double figures,
Not sure what else to say really, in simple terms in the
field we were great but with the bat not. The one thing you
must say is that they took their catches bowled straight and
managed to reach 72 despite being 21-6 off 8.
Oh well, always next year!