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Match report vs Barry Wanderers 22 April 07 @ Hayes Point (Sully Hosp) (Skipper Paul, report Muff)

The following is based on a true story although facts may change for dramatic purposes and time has been compressed.

Contrary to the weather man the sun shone and the pitch looked in good nick, if a little bare around the edges due to some judicious pruning caused by the building work.

Skipper Paul having won the toss glanced at the wicket over his shoulder and decided to bat.

First up Jonny Fand Spanky. Smitts seemed to be on a mission putting bat to ball and running in the "indoor style" which kept john on his toes!! Unfortunately Smitts couldn’t keep it going and was bowled by a cunning straight one.
#don’t know the bowlers names, or the scores for that matter as I don’t have the book!!!!!#
Next up, yours truly, with Paul’s words "I want some runs off you this year" ringing in his ears strolled manfully to the crease only to return to the pavilion a short while later for 0.

At this point the cash were about fuck all for 2 so with some work to do winkie was up. With new bat swinging The Hood got the scoreboard ticking over at last and with John rotating the strike (a euphemism for not hitting the ball off the square!) the pair put on about 30ish before John was out for 18ish of 10950 balls.

Sadly that was the best partnership of the innings as Steveo, Paul, Tesh and Ash all perished after smacking lovely looking boundaries. Meanwhile Andy H was looking good using the oak tree he’s bought to punish any wayward bowling before he too went after one too many and was caught for a splendid 40 (probably would have scored double that but couldn’t lift the bat up after 20 overs!!!)

The next ‘partnership was Foxy and Matt D (Doc), true to form, The Fox gave us the funniest moment of the innings when stretching to make his ground the fielders throw came off his bat and hit the poor bugger on the head! Now I know this isn’t strictly funny but the refusal off the fielder not to throw the ball near Foxy again for fear of killing him most certainly was! Oh yes out for 2.

Last man Dan, determined not to be run out backing up for nought, walks to the crease to join Doc. The Cazh hold their breath. Then let it out again when he walks back bowled for nought!(well at least you got to face one Dan!) leaving Matt D stranded on 8no. 126 all out (Extras were 2nd highest scorer in our innings with 24 ). Bollocks.

After what must be said was a disappointingly frugal tea, the hungry mob were determined to make amends for the crap we'd served up batting by bowling like the tigers we are.

To be fair we did bowl pretty well, Dan after one bad over troubled both batsmen and picked up a wicket, Paul was cheap and Andy Hood was tight as a ducks ass and as usual also picking up a wicket. Unfortunately their first team captain was playing again and once more took the game out of reach with a combination of savage cuts, straight drives and a shed load of edges. As several people pointed out he is human and does have his weaknesses but once again we didn’t find them until it was too late. Doc getting him caught on the boundary by Dan for a well deserved wicket.

All that was left was for me to bowl some wayward crap to bring about a swift end to the game, Barry winning by 7 wickets with 18 overs to spare. Hopefully this was just a little rustiness on our part and we can find the batting form that I know we are capable of because that’s all were missing, our bowling and fielding are good enough to see off anyone as long as we can post a competitive total.

Bowling figs:
Dan 6-2-29-1
Paul 4-0-6-0
Andy 5-1-14-1
Matt 4-0-36-1
Muff 5-0-26-0
Tesh 3-0-7-0

The end.


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