Match report vs Walkovers,
Jersey 20 June 08@ Bry-y-Don, Dinas Powys (Skipper
....Jamie Pike, report J Pike)
The Scottish have an excellent word to describe damp, miserable
weather: dreek. And so it was, that 13 Casuals assembled on
a particularly dreek evening at Bryn -y-Don. There was some
doubt that we would manage to complete the game but since
the opposition were from Jersey (famous for cows and Bergerac)
we decided to try our utmost to get a game in and opted for
a reduced 18 over match.
Vale of Glam council fucked up and we all had to get changed
outside in the rain. The Casuals were very impressed by the
length and width of the enormous bruise on Pikey's right thigh(
alas, far bigger than his penis). Nominated skipper Pabs abdicated
his postion asking Coach P "Do you want to captain? I
can't be arsed" in his best Cardiff accent.
So the newly elected skipper duly went and lost the toss (for
the second game running) and the Walkovers elected to bat
in the drizzle.
There was a fleeting sense of optimism among the Casuals when
it was noted the oppo had lost all four tour games in Wales
prior to this fixture. When it was revealed they had lost
to teams of the calibre of Blackwood and Usk, that sense of
optimism began to diminish faster than Shakey eating a Clarke's
And then the injuries kicked in...
Pabs opened the bowling and promptly tweaked his hamstring.
Three overs in and Manish pulled up chasing the ball in the
field and suddenly the skipper was presented not only with
a bowling dilemma but a batting one too. Keeper Dewbs made
it a hat trick later in the innings when he copped one full
in the goolies from Teshie's quick throw in. Effectively,
we finished the innings with 8 and half men ( Dewbs' voice
had gone up several octaves and a blindman could be forgiven
for thinking he was in the presence of a woman).
The Walkovers scored at a steady, if not spectacular rate,
moving the ball around the quick outfield. Rog and Pabs manfully
probed away without success in the inclement conditions, Pabs
off a very short run up due the injury.
After 8 overs Walkovers were 53 without loss and their skipper,
Vauner, despite being dropped twice, was looking good at the
crease. The breakthrough came in the 9th over when the Fantastic
Mr Fox undid their opener English with a beautifully flighted
delivery. Meanwhile, Shakey had come on for Rog at the other
end and bowled a miserly opening over.
Walkovers found themselves 60 for 2 after 11, when a sharp
piece of fielding by the skipper throwing in to Foxy, ran
out their number three for a duck.
The pressure was on the Walkovers as their run rate had dropped
considerably. However, with wickets in hand and their skipper
rapidly approaching his half century, the next 7 overs were
to yield 67 runs for only one more wicket.
That came courtesy of that man Fox, who bowled Coynes through
his legs for 1. 73 for 3 off 13. The rest of it was a mixed
bag and as the ball became a bar of yellow soap, the rain
got slightly heavier, and our fielding began to deteriorate
along with the weather.
Vauner punished anything loose and made a well-wrought 68
not out, which included 11 fours. He was ably assisted by
Cowlin at number 5 who came in and bludgeoned a quick 25 not
The last two overs, by the part-time bowlers Pike and O'Reilly
- the latter, who earlier in the game had disappeared as Foxy
was running in to bowl to piss behind a telegraph pole the
other side of the boundary - went for a hefty 26, as the batsmen
attempted to hit everything and our fielding became generous,
to put it politely.
P Stephens 4 overs, 0 for 23
R Bannister 4 overs 0 for 29
Fox 4 overs 2 for 24
M Stephens 4 overs 0 for 24
Pike 1 over 0 for 16
O'Reilly 1 over 0 for 10
Amazingly, despite the damp ball, there were only 7 extras,
5 of which were wides.
With a mountain to climb and the rain becoming heavier and
the light gloomier, Easy and the piss artist O'Reilly opened
Steveo, who had been boasting before the game about his splendid
46 against the Cardiff Blind School, went first, bowled by
Patterson for 2 off 5 balls (3 for 1 off 1).
In came Tesh. What happened in the second over owed more to
the slapstick world of Charlie Chaplin than cricket, as the
now mandatory Casuals comedy run out gave the visitors a laugh
and another early wicket.
Easy pushed one to the leg side, called 'yes' and purposefully
ran up the wicket. Tesh, statuesque at the other end, said
'no'. Easy, now stranded between the devil and the deep blue
sea, slipped on his arse in the rain, and the fielder had
time to spare before drawing to a close the novelty act. Easy
out for 1 off 3 balls.
'Thanks Tesh, you fucker!' Easy was heard to bark. 6 for 2
Next in, the hobbling Manish, aided by his 'runner', O'Reilly.
Two more overs of comedy running ensued. Steveo looking for
a three and making it but Tesh calling 'no' and standing his
ground forcing the bearded one to scuttle back to whence he
came for refuge. There then followed a heated debate from
22 yards about who was right and who was wrong.
Manish departed in the fifth for 2 off 12 balls , caught
following a deflection off the keeper, by first slip. 15 for
3 off 5 and things were looking grimmer than the weather.
Roachy and Tesh stabilised the ship, seeing off the Walkovers'
opening pair, Patterson and Mitchell, who bowled admirably
in the steady rain. Patterson finished with 2 for 17 and Mitchell
0 for 12, leaving the Casuals 32 for 3 off 8 and needing a
Tesh and Roachy hit some lusty fours until JR was unluckily
run out for 18 off 16 balls(two fours) in the 11th over. The
ball cannoned off the keeper, who was standing up, onto the
stumps with JR just out of his ground. 53 for 4 off 12.
Tesh followed in the 13th bowled by Cox for 22 off 27 balls,
including two fiercely struck fours.
Pike joined Shakey at the crease with score 55 for 5 after
12.3 overs. 'Let's try and reach 90' Shakey said.
The two did just that, putting on 46 in the next five overs.
Shakey dominated the bowlers, while Pikey pushed ones and
twos. The running was surprisingly good between the two, as
they strove to make the score look more respectable.
Shakey played some lovely pull shots and cuts to reach 33
in 25 balls before he was caught in the gully. 101 for 6 in
the 17th. No-nuts Dewbs came to the wicket for the final few
deliveries, attempting to give the skipper a heart attack
with quick doubles.
So, we reached 111 for 6, 16 short. Pike finished 15 not out
off 14 and Scooby 1 off 1.
In truth, the opposition always had us at arms length and
didn't bowl all of their best bowlers but at least we ended
the game positively and showed them that on another day things
might have been a lot closer. Taking into account the fact
they had the better of the playing conditions, and two of
our more experienced players, Manish and Pabs, were injured
during the game, all in all, we didn't do too badly.
An eventful game, played in a decent spirit despite the pissing
rain, against a good bunch of lads. Maybe we should have a
return match in Jersey next season? Get those Bergerac re-runs
After the game the opposition kindly presented us with a
beautifully engraved silver memento. Foxy repaid their generosity
by presenting them with a Casuals blue cap, much to their
delight. The only disappointing thing was that they had to
go back to Cardiff straight after the game, while most of
the Casuals went to the Merry Harrier to eat crisps and dry