Cardiff Casuals Cricket Club
 
last updated 14/10/2008
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Glossary

Want to know more about the Casuals or how to get into their heads? Use this simple glossary to talk like them, act like them and confuse all those around you!

This is the newest addition to the Casuals website. A product of Goughy which has taken a number of years to collate, the result of the hard work is below and is much anticipated.

A

Akbari
As a relative new comer to the team – Ashley has fitted in very well- he gets involved, is over weight and average with both bat and ball. Perfect. This Iranian has yet to show his potential but will be forever remembered as offering to ‘bat for the other side’ ……

A-Team
If you’ve got a problem, no-one else can help – then you can hire the A-Team’…..Sadly if you did you wouldn’t get George Peppard et al you would probably get the very cheap Casuals version….sorry very, very cheap and unfit Casuals version.

They consist of:
Hanibal Smith – Foxy Prior
B.A – Paul (I ain’t go in no Punto you crazy fool) Stephens
Face – Dan (Shagger) Lewis
Murdoch – Scott (Howling Mad) Fitzgerald
Ably assisted by:
Amy – Steve (I grew these tits myself) O’Reilly

(Please note this is not our best team, only those that fitted the a-team characteristics)

Andy F
Younger member of the deadly, but portly, Furnham brother combination. Never without his shorts and Australian cricket cap, Andy bowls medium pace and can wield the willow to devastating effect. Most notably by hitting a four off the final ball to beat Miskin Manor in 2004.
Andy is also the club video-grapher and aside from filming hours of exceedingly dull cricket he is also able to capture unsuspecting woman as they pass (See Scrut)

Andy H (See Winkie)

Awesome Foursome
The title given to the indoor opening pair of Pablo and Jonny F as they carved out a number of fine stands giving the Casuals a winning start. Not to be confused with the other fine opening pairing of Muff and Goughy – The Grow-some Twosome.

B

B.A
As seen above – the nickname for Paul Stephens, one half of the brothers that between them have almost 600 caps to their name! Paul is a collector of porn, music and cricket bats – none of which ever seem to work properly! The most capped player in the club and a mine of information about games past, also doubles up as a useful bowler of spin and medium pace. Just watch out for that slower ball! Paul also manages to be the current treasurer and has books clean enough for the taxman to eat off.

Bagpuss (See Shakes)

Baggy (See Shakes)

Ball Scoop
In the big hitting world of the casuals the stream at our Wenvoe ground is an easy swipe away. To save the club time and financial ruin Foxy went into his workshop and came out with a cobbled together Heath Robinson ball scoop. This was promptly damaged by some local hoodlum and the Casuals now use the ‘Foxyfoxballscoop MkII’

Barry Chanderpaul (from Barry) (see also Dewbs)
This is the alter ego of Dewbs whilst he's at the crease. Barry materialised during the summer of 07, Dewbs was struggling with his batting performances so he looked on the telebox for inspiration and found that Shivnarine Chanderpaul was scoring a ridiculous amount of runs for the West Indies. His in-depth analysis surmised that it was all down to Chanderpaul's very open batting stance. The stance was first put on competitive display in a tour game against Staplegrove, Somerset. During the very brief innings it was commented upon by co-players that it resembled a 'seaside' stance. In Dewbs' post innings camera interview he was asked as to where he got the idea - "Chanderpaul" came the answer, "Barry Chanderpaul, Chanderpaul's cousin?" was the cameraman's response. Fellow player, BA asked - "Where's he from?". Before Dewbs could answer, 'quick-witted' onlookers shouted "Barry" in unison. (You see how sharp we can be...)

Bar, The (See Ashley Akbari)
We think he gets this name because he manages to do everything BAR make runs and take wickets!

BBN Big Bat Nadders – (see Nadders)

Big Willy
He gets his name not because of apparatus size, but because of his commanding presence…or maybe just his size! Big Willy (real name Will Goad) has the honour of being one of only two left handed batsmen in the club and his belligerent straight technique makes him the ideal opening batsman. He also has in his possession one of the slowest bouncers known to man!

Billy Mango
Billy is rarely seen but often heard, many Casuals believe that he only ever speaks to and can be heard by Fitzy . When he does speak its usually some spurious nonsensical rant about ice cream. I think prison really did warp his brain.

Blue pants
The favourite attire of Casuals irregular Rob Chase. No matter what he’s wearing on top one can always see his blue pants lurking underneath as he changes in the car park or wherever else he can find to change without his fellow team mates seeing him. Strange.

Bump, Mr (See ‘Shakes’)
If you arrange the words ‘accident prone’ you come up with Mark Stephens – an amazing if not fully accurate fact!

C

Cake
Next to pies, cake is one of the most talked about food items. When the teas are laid out the- thoughts turn from victory to gluttony and the cakes are a sure fire way to make this happen. The cake provided is fairly immaterial but if it has a wrapper then it can be taken to the field to boost sugar levels or boredom levels.

Casual No Stars
The Tuesday night indoor team that have inexplicably won the league on a number of occasions.

Casualties
The Monday night indoor team that strutted to league victory in their first season.

Cat shit
A cry given out by the fielding side when the ball flies in the air to a fielder.
(Not to be confused with ‘oh-shit’ -the cry generally given out by said fielder when the ball is dropped)

Committee
The committee is made up of seven men strong and true. These casuals are the guardians of the club and try to uphold the values of the constitution and the general well being of the club. To enter this elite group a casual must pass the ‘Initiation’ comprising of a cricket helmet, 6 pork pies, stop watch and a jockstrap..- once in they have to undertake some mundane task which they generally do whilst they should be working!

Constitution
The constitution outlines the very principles that the casuals live and die by. This was drawn up by the forefathers of the club and holds the key to many a committee debate. Its fundamentals note the importance of equal opportunity and regular leadership changes to keep the club from becoming autocratic.

'Come one' (Goughy wedding)
The gentle cry heard when Goughy is batting, much out of character, but he heard it said by some proper cricketers once and thought it would help him sound less like a bumpkin.

Cricket porn (See Statistics)

Cxxx
Does this really need an explanation? A well loved word.

D

Dan (See Radar, Shagger or Webmaster)

DB
Abbreviated nickname given to mercurial rotund and loveable off spinner – Dave Thomas, so called because of his uncanny likeness to the American eatery icon. Don’t call it to his face though – Scary
“"I don’t like Goughy he calls me Doughboy"” – DB 2004

Death Knock
Unpleasant incident to watch (See AF's example)

Deji
This brisk bowler only played a handful of games for the Casuals but will be sadly missed after almost killing the opposition with his bowling in one of his few games.

Dewbs
A young streak of piss. He really should eat more you know. An average player all round but a welcome new addition who has posted saucy pictures of Mrs Dewbs in a casuals top…….’come one!’.

Dr Rubbish
Pseudonym of pace bowler Gareth John, who steamed in for the Casuals over a number of seasons and scared the opposition and Casuals to death. The batsmen and wicketkeeper had no idea where the ball would land and this was also true of Dr Rubbish himself. A joy to watch when on song.

Doughboy (See DB)

Dough ball
The one-time favourite delivery of Doughboy (see above). A full or loose delivery that was so called because of its uncanny knack at getting wickets when it only deserved to have a boundary taken from it. This is no longer DB’s stock delivery as he’s bowling much better with absolutely no reward. Now the stock ball of Fitzy and used with only some success.

Durnallesque
A cricket shot named after its founder – Chris Durnall, very difficult to describe but even harder to play! It is attempted by the batmen wafting his bat in front of his pad (aiming to square leg) and looking to play every ball in that direction! Where the ball goes depends on what contact is made, this usually causes an amazingly fine off or leg glance.

In the field, Chris Durnall is a master at preventing runs by allowing the ball to thunder into his shins, chest or face – usually anything apart from his hands (and he was the keeper).

DVD (See Video)

E

Easy
Nomme de guerre given to one of the founder members of the club - Chris Ryde (Easy Ryder) get it! Chris has played for the cazh since it’s inception and in 2005 scored his first 50 – a magnificent knock versus South Wales Echo. Some called it crafted and chanceless – others told the truth. It is not just scoring runs that interests Chris – he also loves to dress up in women’s clothing and prance around on the stage in his spare time for various local amateur companies. Indeed a cry can usually be heard when he is fielding that relates to his other passion – ‘Its behind you’!!

EVBR
The Ebbw Vale Bum Rub - explaination to follow....

Ex – Players
Even if you are not a current player you usually stay a ‘casual’ till you die. Once you have tasted cricket from the casual’s cup you will be impregnated with the casual spirit – including the lack of talent. Some players are immune to this and are happy to turn there back and rescind their casual status as soon as they leave!

F

Fat side
The team comprising of gentlemen with a fuller figure. Yes the fatties! Although an imaginary concept the fat and thin game would certainly turn the way of the fatties as they are a dominant force within the club!

Fitzy
Many years ago I read ‘The Great Gatsby’ – a book set in a time of elegance and beauty with a cast list of many erudite and intelligent members of the upper class…why do I tell you this? Well its author was F Scott Fitzgerald and our Fitzy is Scott Fitzgerald the ‘F’ is silent but stands for fuckwit or fuckarse or floundering or….anyway you get the picture.
Fitzy sits at the other end of the social scale to the characters in the book as when he tried to better himself he ended up doing stir at the request of her Majesty the Queen. Now on the straight and narrow he spends his time as a window cleaner cum comedian cum stagehand cum smoker!

Flipper
The curious nickname of Kevin Mavely (bowler), which could maybe refer to one of the balls in his armory, although not sure we would spot it if he did.
There’s also a song for him going along the lines of:
‘They call him flipper for he’s a killer whale..’!!!!

Forum
Due to marvelous technical advances made on the interweb the Casuals can keep in almost constant contact via the forum. The chat inside is varied but has been an invaluable tool in keeping the club running since its inception.

Fourth, The (See Ashley Akbari (AA))

Foxy
The side’s elder statesman – John Prior is one of the founder members of the team and never fails to remind the team of this. John has defied everyone’s expectations and continues to play well into his mid 60’s. It is rumoured that Foxy has to be very careful during each game as he has to be taken back to the museum to be put back on display post game. Recently honoured by the Queen and is John Foxy Prior MBE.

Furnhams
You certainly don’t get many of these boys to the pound. Those big Furnham boys are long standing members of the club and have contributed many runs and wickets between them.

Fredalo
The ginger ninja that is Fred Locke who inexplicably took 4 wickets on his bowling debut much to the bemusement of himself, his team and also the opposition. Fred likes to wield the willow and his tall frame helps him ‘long handle’ when needed.

G Goughy
The erudite, genial and dashing right handed batsman who turns his hand to the occasional military medium bowling and more regularly to the keeping gauntlets – from which you can often hear faint murmurings and much encouragement. Simon is very competitive and always tries to score more runs and 50’s than Shakes – generally he wins that battle! (p.s. Goughy wrote this…)
H  
I

If only..
An over used Casual’s phrase. ‘If only I had not tried to slog that ball’ or ‘If only I had got somewhere near that ball instead of thinking about pies..’ or (as in Shakes case) ‘If only I hadn’t eaten my body weight in takeaways for the last 10 years I’d be able to run around in the outfield without feeling the onset of angina’

Indoor cricket
It took many years of big defeats against some very good teams before the casuals worked out how to play this game and they managed to win 3 leagues titles in 06 and 07 some intelligent, passionate and classical cricket (and suicidal running).

J

Jam Funny Horn
The anagramitical epithet of Jonny F - a quality piece of word work by one of the younger members – Dewbs. Can also be tweaked for the slightly more homourous - Jum Fanny Horn, but Jam seems to fit.

Jeff
Jeff Clapham is one of the less regular team players but when he does turn up his metronomic bowling style dries up one end and inevitably leads to frustrating the batsmen. Good ole clappers.

Jonny F
The leading run scorer for the club, with almost 4,000 runs. John exudes class on the pitch and when on song can destroy any attack. When not in form one wonders how he ever gets any runs (certainly without being given lbw!!)

JR
The rather lame nickname for James Roach, who after some success with his ‘double bouncer’ has turned his hand to bowling spin. Never without his floppy hat JR is a baby making machine and recently gave birth to his 7th child….or is it now only 2? JR is developing into a fine Durnallesque player, with hanging bat technique and the lying flat on your back fielding position.

K Kim Swain
Another overseas player who came to the casuals with high hopes and has proved true to his own word!! This left handed batsman and bowler has the uncanny knack of scoring runs, taking wickets and winding people up – usually his own team.
L Ladyboy Trophy
This award was first given to Big Willy for accruing a slow 40 in the sun at Pentrych and then having to be off the next day off work with sunstroke. This trophy was thought up by Muff who bequeathed it before going off round the world. It now gets given every year by the present incumbent.

LBW
Whatever you do – use your bat. To allow the ball to hit the pad and then undergo the torture of waiting for a fellow Casual to adjudicate on your fate is just not worth it. The decisions given or not given are bewildering and you are not even safe if you DO hit the ball – sound familiar Pikey.
M

Manish
A classy batsmen who occasionally plays for the Caszh. When not dropping down a standard or two he plays for some team in the valleys the name of which escapes me!

Match Reports
Introduced in 2004, a requirement now after every game, though in recent times have become quite rude...

Maveleys
These brothers played for the casuals for a number of seasons but only really ever spoke a couple of words each throughout. The younger brother – Colin was always up for a game of ‘Lets Run out Colin’ which was sadly his demise in most games.

M.D
The ‘doctor’ or the ‘spin doctor’ - Matt Davies is a phenomenon in the casual’s ranks as he actually spins the ball and takes wickets. MD is a stalwart of the indoor league and until very recently had the honour of being one of the few players to be unbeaten in that format.

Monty (See also Shakes)
Nickname given to Mark Stephens for to his fielding and not his facial hair, before Panesar had a lesson or two.

Muff
Who needs a new nickname when you come to the club already having the handle of ‘Muff’. Matt Foote is his real name but can be barely remembered when ‘Muff’ just trips off the tongue....... The leading wicket taker in 2005, Muff has a gentle action and swings the ball from the hand and will look to get stumpings and catches before nipping in a straight one (or doosra) to get the batsman plum in front. You can also order your own version of Muff online at www.actionmanbikers.com/smoking

N

Nadders
In his first season Nadders batted very rarely and managed only a single run, this he rectified in his second season with a new big bat.

Nets
The one chance of the year for members of the side to get into ‘nick’ on the distinctly alien track at Sophia Gardens. Given the chance to build an innings the Casuals generally try to flay the bowling to all parts without any comprehension of how this will affect their form in the following season. The bowlers have the opportunity to bowl bouncers for the only time that year and fatally overuse this to the point of boredom.

O

O.F.W (Willy's wedding)
In the days when Will Goad was not attached (physically and actually) to his Wife –Emma, the cry (as a fat lass passed by) went up – OFW!! Meaning ‘One for Will’. A cruel taunt and jibe at both the girl and Will, but who’s laughing now. Will with Emma at his side or the Casual boys with Pam and her five sisters for company!

Osmar (See Steveo)

P

Pablo (See also B.A)

Padre
A player now excommunicated to Haverford West, but still a Casuals legend. Matt Williams had a good eye, a fast arm and bad feet – the sort that the side’s podiatrist diagnosed as ‘a lost cause’. Padre loved to drink and on one occasion slept off an enormous hangover before batting and then promptly scored a magnificent 50.

Pie Ball
The psychologists in the Casuals back room staff came up with this idea following a dreadful month in the 2004 season when catches were being dropped and games were being lost. The idea was and is ingeniously simple – when the ball is in the air, don’t panic and picture the ball as not, a hard red leather thing screaming towards you, but instead a juicy pie! This way those fat pie loving Casuals will take extra care with it and not allow it to hit the floor, thus not ‘spilling the filling’ and taking the catch!

Pies (eating)
A hobby that is shared by many of the Casuals, pies are not merely a food they are seen as a food from the gods. Much debate surrounds the superlative pie filling and the finest pie selling establishment. That debate will rage on and on - but there is no argument that the Casuals love a good Pie!

Pikey
In his pen pic Pikey states that his previous teams include ‘Pikes penguins’ – since playing with the casuals its been more of a case of ‘Pikes ducks’! This scouser has a knack of getting unlucky / poor decisions going against him but he keeps smiling and has even shown some great skill in compiling 50’s for the club.

Porno - (see Andy F)

Q Quick single
A phrase coined on the 2002 tour to alert other Casuals to the presence of an attractive member of the opposite sex. This ‘code word’ was implemented to replace the overused and too often overheard phrase - ‘phwroor’. More subtle than the aforementioned but when overheard just left the woman confused and amused.
R

Radar (See also ‘Shagger’)
Another name given to ‘speed merchant’ Dan Lewis, it is used mainly as irony as he often fails to bring his with him to the game, giving batsmen and wicketkeepers alike a very hard time! The nickname was mainly heard echoing around the outfield on games when his girlfriend was watching!

Richie
The casuals captain for seasons 2005/06 and the baldest member of the team. When on form Richie will hit the ball long and hard and gain quick valuable runs. Also holds the club’s bowling record (6-10) mainly due to the oppo’s scorer’s cricket book illiteracy and marking a ‘wide’ with a dot.

Roger
The nickname of young ‘paceman’ and sideburn enthusiast Jamie Bannister. He may not be able to run a four minute mile but he can certainly bowl at that pace.

Running (Between the wickets)
A dark art, mastered by very few people in the club. Once it is mastered they soon realize that you have to do it with your bat down and at a pace greater than that of a fat snail. Due to this most people just don’t bother trying!

S

Scooby (See Dewbs)

Scrut
Not sure its one you would find in the O.E.D, but ‘scrut’ is a hybrid word which captures the essence of the words it’s derived from. It comes from ‘scrubber’ and ‘slut’ and used to describe women of much ropiness!!

Shagger (See also –‘Radar’ and ‘Webmaster’)
The other, more popular, nickname of Dan Lewis. So called because of his supposed prowess with the opposite sex! Not sure how true this is but who could resist his cheeky grin and muscular arse! Dan is the premier speed merchant of the club and can be devastating at Wenvoe, down the slope with the breeze behind him!

Shakes (AKA Mr Bump, Statto or Bagpuss [baggy])
The other half of the Stephens brothers, who until recently was the heart and soul of the casuals set up, being the fixture secretary, league fixture secretary and the club statistician. With Council business precluding him from many matches Shakes is less of a stalwart but can still plunder a very long 20 of a Sunday. He also has off spin in his repertoire but is sadly under bowled (his words not mine)

Shandy
The rather base pet name for all rounder Scott Hand. This casual arrived in the influx of players in 2007 and has been true to the ideals of the club with some strong socializing and a mixed bag of performances. Shandy is also one of the club photographers and if he turns up to watch he will invariably bring his Nikon with him.

Sharif
Sharif don’t like it – rock the casbah, rock the casbah! A rookie of 2007, didn’t play much, but when he did was forced to give it his all, on one occasion by running a three with two crocked legs.

Shot selection
In the casuals this amounts to one thing – “I select to hit every ball, no matter where it is”. Used often as an ill-advised tactic.

Slow ‘n’ low
The Wenvoe pitch in a nutshell. Who needs Boycott with his silly hat and the bunch of keys?

Slips
Not to be confused with real slip fielders, this position is often more for the fuller figured Casuals to stand where they feel there will be no running. Very rarely does a ball fly through this area, but when it does…….its usually dropped or missed.

Smitts
One of the new influx of players who may have captured Shagger’s crown as the teams Young Stud-muffin – however he has yet to prove as productive in this area. In terms of his cricket Smitty has a decent record and has recorded his first 50 for the club with many more to come. He also holds the wicketkeeping gauntlets at present and he tries (but fails) to be as mouthy as Goughy.

Spanky (see Smitts)
Aquired this nickname due to his graphic story telling ability regarding the 2006 game vs Sudbrook...

Spiv (See Smitts…..again)

Spider
Another of Dewbs nicknames – he picked this one up on Tour 07, one thing to learn – never admit your fears!

Spoons, The
Colloquial name for the pub frequented by a number of the players after a Sunday match, its charm, atmosphere, clientele, location and cheap drinks make it a must for thirsty Casuals to drown their sorrows and relive the match changing events of the afternoon.

Srini
Hailing form Mumbai (I think that’s either outside Llandindod Wells or somewhere foreign – India?) Srini found his way to the Casuals and then found his way into the Casuals record books. He managed to slog over a thousand runs in 2 seasons and is the holder of the most runs in a season crown with 691 runs, eclipsing Goughy’s 676 set the previous season. He also proved able with the ball and only ever failed at getting people to understand him. Srini now resides in Australia, but will always be a Casual.

Sriniisms (the verb to Srini)
During Srini's many innings for the Cazh apart from slogging many boundaries he also brought a new style of playing out each over. It mainly consisted of playing the first 5 balls and then taking a single off the last. Some of the Casuals have adopted this style of play and it is known as 'to Srini'.

Examples/ derivatives:
Well Srinied, mate!
Player X is an expert Srinier.
The innings contained much Sriniing.
etc

Statto (See ‘Shakes’ above)

Stat Porn
Due to the high number of statisticians within the side, a plethora of statistics are compiled each season, these range from runs / wickets per season to wins per venue. The stats are lovingly compiled by Shakes and in lieu of a girlfriend he has his spreadsheet.
A hugely enjoyable read at the end of the season! The only statistic to be omitted is the player’s average, which due to the clubs constitution is not talked about. However everyone works it out as soon as they are produced.

SteveO
The loveable curly haired clown of the team who constantly (as an excuse) claims not having played the game for long….he now into his 8th season!

SteveOism’s Peculiar to Steve, there are a number of habits, which are worthy of note.
• Always arriving late at a ground having got lost claiming – ‘I’ve only played here a few times’!
• Always forgetting to bring a towel to the match.
• Playing ‘peek a boo’ whilst keeping. He had to go to hospital…….
• Playing across the line at a straight one and wondering why his stumps are lying prostrate.
• Having a son that is under strict instruction to not talk to strange men – hence has never said a word to any of the casuals.
• Having the longest ever pre-ball routine of any batsmen.

Stumpy
The less popular nickname for Wicketkeeper and vertically challenged gobshite – Goughy. It took one to know one as this moniker was bestowed upon him by Muff!

T

Talking Horse (TH)
The nickname given to one of the leaner and more gentle members of the team – Ed Dain. An all-rounder with the look of university don, the manners of a gentleman but the habit of winding up opposition players and Penelope Keith look-alike woman without meaning to. TH now resides beyond our shores but is welcome back if he ever comes this way again. We salute you TH – why did you ever get mixed up with such a bunch of ill educated men though?

Teas
Opposition beware! We may be crap on the field but in the pavilion with teas in front of us we are really dangerous. You better get in there quickly otherwise you may be left empty plated!

Thin Side
A side compiled of the thinner members of the club, which have given those fatties a jolly good run for their money. The side most Casuals would like to be in.

Thrush (See Kim Swain)

Thumb Bumming (Pikey wedding)
A new phenomenon from Scouseland, first discovered at Pikey's wedding Sept 08

Tits (Thomas)
Not to be confused with Dave (Doughboy) Thomas, ‘Tits’ is the affectionate AKA given to Justin Thomas, fast bowler and all round smiler. He even manages a smile when one slips out of the hand and nearly kills a batsman. Where is he now?

Tickle, Mr
Mr Tickle (aka Mitesh Hirani – aka Tesh)
Joined the club in 2004 in the outdoor close season and played many indoor games and managed to fool many a casual into thinking he was a stylish batsman. This he has subsequently laid to rest with a mixed bag of performances with both bat and ball. Indoor can spin the ball a mile.

Tour stories
Very little happens on tour apart from drinking, puking, passing out and playing poor cricket. But for the record – ‘What goes on tour…………’

Tour Trophy
The accolade bestowed upon the cricketer to make the greatest impression on tour. This prize is sponsored by Tudor Thomas (Dad of Doughboy) and has been awarded for good cricket, drunkenness, pulling scrut and even for having a massive bar bill. The current holder is Goughy who is holding it for the 3rd Time in 5 tours.

U Underdogs
Amazingly enough the Casuals have recorded some famous victories in the last few seasons and mainly when the opposition are far better than us! The Casuals seem to enjoy playing better opposition and the batsmen generally appreciate a good flat batting track …for a change.
V Video
The most eagerly anticipated moment in the close season is when BA arrives in the pub with the previous season’s club video! At the paltry sum of £10 it is a must for any Casual – reliving last years batting collapses and laughing at all the off field antics performed to forget about what was going on in the middle. Ably filmed by Andy F (+ guests) and edited and hosted by the deadpan Paul Stephens it is a monumental bit of filmmaking and worthy of many an award.
W

Walking
Not often done as a means of exercise or to get to places, but always done when a faint snick to the keeper is given and the umpire is unsure. Very sporting and the way in which the game should be played.

Webmaster (See Shagger)

Website
Shaggers pride and joy. The Cardiff Casuals website has been a useful tool in recruiting new players to the club, sadly though we are now like Jonny Fs stomach after tea…very full! We cannot sustain any more new players. The website is also a font of all knowledge with enough reading for Casuals, friends and web browsers alike.

Wenvoe
Home ground of the Cazh (since the demise of YMCA, St Mellon's 2002). An 'interesting' Shakey fact is that the Cazh have won 70% of all games played here...mainly due to the fact that the ball doesn't bounce....

Willow League
This is where the Casuals play there competitive cricket and have shown the full spectrum of cricketing ability from pxxspoor to league winning. The Casuals won the league in the rain affected 2007 season after being in the top 2 or 3 for a number of seasons.

Winkie
The nickname for a former casual captain – Andy Hood. Andy is one of the top wicket takers for the club, and if he had any justice, would have taken many more with his brand of line and length that can tie up one end whilst bilge is bowled from the other. With the onset of old age , Andy has recently begun to bowl less and is now bowling at the death….to great effect.

Whiplash
A medical condition first discovered by Matt Foote (Muff) - as with normal whiplash it affects the neck area; however it is not caused by a motoring accident! Muff was afflicted with it after a rather expensive spell of bowling and he injured his neck after watching a series of shots whistle straight back over his head! The only known cure for prevention of this is to either bowl more economically or just bowl it wide or short so the ball is dispensed square of the wicket!

Would you/Wouldn't you?
A 'game' or discussion that has occured many times in the season of 2008 to 'lift' spirits due to the rainy season - this is usually regarding Actresses (Alive or...Dead)

X

X-bat slog
The sort of shot that Kevin Peterson plays with grace and elegance is some what of an ill advised shot selection for many a casual, who most times realize seconds too late that they should have played a straight bat! (see also SteveO – the main exponent)

Xmas meal
Traditionally, in most societies, this is done prior to the festivities but in the world of the Casual this is done in almost February. Over the last few years this has taken place at the foolishly named – ‘All you can eat Chinese buffet’ and has taken the form of watching Shakes eat ‘All the Chinese Buffet’. One foolish Casual tried to out eat Shakes and is now in exile in America.

Y

YBTU
You Be The Umpire - no, this isn't the exclaimation just before each innings (usually players hiding behind sight screens or going to the toilet just before), but a forum favourite, hosted by Jam Funny Horn. Has actually meant most of the team are more confused than they previously were...

Youth Policy
We do not have one. We are not well enough equipped and we prefer the company of old, fat and generally unfit men. Who needs these young fit pups making us feel decidedly sedentary?

Z Zzzzzzzzzz
The general feeling you get as you watch the Casuals bat on a long cold Sunday afternoon.

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